Infusion #2: Post-Infusion Day #7
OPEN: I chose this word as my “word for the year” prior to the spontaneous serving of my side dish of breast cancer.
Rewind to my first days as an ambassador of lululemon-Fashion Valley. I had the privilege of meeting and getting to know one of the most amazing human beings on the planet: Mrs. Kimberly (I affectionately call her “Kimbo”) Smith. At the time, she was acting as an Assistant Manager (ASM) of Lulu’s Fashion Valley store and was our “go-to” for all things ambassador related. She doesn’t know it to this day, but she taught me one of my biggest life lessons: ‘be open to receiving.’
Allow me to set the stage for pretty much every lululemon event where we, the ambassadors, were being “surprised and delighted” (a lululemon catchphrase for spoiling the sh%$ out of us):
Act I: Kimberly, along with her team of superheroes coordinates spectacular events (examples: kayaking trek at La Jolla Cove followed by catered dinner and collective gathering, dressing room parties (yes, I was treated like a queen…and still am :) ) at my Lulu store, photo-shoot by the extraordinarily talented Armin Razmy...you get the picture (pun intended).
Act II: Kellie attempts to assist Kimberly and her merry band of superheroes with any and all aspects of the set-up, coordination, clean-up at every single event…primarily because that’s what Kellie does. She cannot receive. Kellie MUST be doing SOMETHING ALL OF THE TIME. She can’t stand still. She is a DOER! Okay…you again get the picture (no pun this time).
Act III: Kimberly reminds Kellie multiple times at each and every event, “You are the receiver, this is for you, relax and enjoy.” (Not certain those were her exact words, but spot on summary of Kimberly’s commentary.)
Act IV: Kellie stands awkwardly off to the side not quite certain of what to do with herself. Twiddles thumbs. Makes awkward conversation with fellow attendees while allowing the following thoughts to ‘hamster wheel’ in her head, “What do I do now…I MUST BE DOING! How can I help? She’s not letting me! This is weird! Argh MUST BE DOING! WHAT DO I DO?!?”
Act V: Fast forward to January 1, 2020. Kellie chooses “open” as her word for the year.
Act VI: Fast forward to January 10, 2020. Kellie receives diagnosis of Stage I - Invasive Ductal Carcinoma.
Act VII: Fast forward to the blur that is our current situation in the midst of #chemoingthroughcovid. Kellie can do nothing BUT be open to receiving right now. She’s face planting over having chosen “open” as her word for 2020 while at the same time finding gratitude for those valuable lessons Kimbo taught her in the early days of her Lulu ambassadorship. Kellie is dependent upon her #framily for all things relating to groceries, errands, etc. Kellie MUST receive, Kellie MUST NOT do and Kellie has to ALLOW more than ever before. This is the hardest life lesson and yet most valuable life lesson Kellie has every learned.
Okay…enough with the stage setting and play-by-play (not to worry…I’ll never stop the pun-nage). I’ve swallowed my pride, put a halt to my need to DO & CONTROL and reminded myself of the fact that years and years of walking into the studios where I teach, countless hours of showing up with my whole, authentic and best self are being reciprocated ten-fold by my tribe. Isis and I pause every single day and stand in awe at the acts of service so generously bestowed upon us in our time of immense need. Not a day goes by where we receive a text/DM asking if we need groceries, meals, anything. Each and every message is consistently a “wow” moment for us!
There will be a day when I’m finally able to GIVE BACK, and watch out world, that day is going to be one HELLUVA celebration! Until that day, I remain OPEN. Open to receiving. Open to love. Open to whatever the universe has in store for me.
Kimberly “Kimbo” Smith, I am forever grateful for the invaluable life lesson you taught me. You, my friend, are a gift to the universe.
Love,
Photo Credit: Armin Razmy
